Episode 202: Self Worth = Net Worth: How to Live in Abundance
Self-worth isn’t just a fun phrase to throw around, it’s a way of being.
In this episode, Erin gives you her go-to six steps for living in abundance rather than in scarcity. If you’ve been focusing on the negative lately, this episode is for you.
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Erin Diehl is the founder and Chief “Yes, And” officer of improve it! and host of the improve it! Podcast. She’s a performer, facilitator and professional risk-taker who lives by the mantra, “get comfortable with the uncomfortable.” Through a series of unrelated dares, Erin has created improve it!, a unique professional development company that pushes others to laugh, learn and grow. Her work with clients such as United Airlines, PepsiCo, Groupon, Deloitte, Motorola, Walgreens, and The Obama Foundation earned her the 2014 Chicago RedEye Big Idea Award and has nominated her for the 2015-2019 Chicago Innovations Award.
This graduate from Clemson University is a former experiential marketing and recruiting professional as well as a veteran improviser from the top improvisational training programs in Chicago, including The Second City, i.O. Theater, and The Annoyance Theatre.
When she is not playing pretend or facilitating, she enjoys running and beach dates with her husband and son, and their eight-pound toy poodle, BIGG Diehl.
You can follow the failed it! podcast on Instagram @learntoimproveit and facebook, and you can follow Erin personally on Instagram @keepinitrealdiehl here. You can also check out improve it! and how we can help your organization at www.learntoimproveit.com. We can’t wait to connect with you online!
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Episode 202 Transcription
Erin (00:00):
Hi new friend. I'm Erin Diehl, business Improv Edutainer, failfluencer, and keynote speaker who is ready to help you improve your it, it being the thing that makes you, you. So think of me as your keeping it real. Professional development bestie who is here to help you develop yourself into the best version of you possible so you can develop your team and lead with intentionality, transparency, and authenticity. Oh, and did I mention we're improving your IT through play? That's right. I'm an improvisational comedy expert who uses experiential learning to help you have your aha haha moments. Those are the moments when the light bulb goes off and you're laughing at the same time. So grab your chicken hat, your notebook, and your inner child because I'm going to take you on a journey that is both fun and transformative. Welcome to the Improve It Podcast!
Erin (01:08):
Improve It peeps. Welcome to this show. I am so excited to chat with you. Today's theme is all about self-worth equals your net worth, how to live in abundance, okay? And I say today's theme because it goes hand in hand with this month's theme. Okay? This month on the show, the month of September, we are talking all about investing in you, the most important person in your life, your soulmate, your best friend, you. Now, this concept is super simple, but it is so hard to keep in practice. Trust me, because I'm a human being, living a human experience. I'm a soul, I guess living a human experience. And I have gotten out of this practice many days, many weeks, many, you could even say probably years of my life, I have been out of this practice. So know that when we talk about investing in you, that means we talk about putting time, effort, energy, and committing to you.
Erin (02:22):
So before we get into today's show, I just wanna do a couple of housekeeping things. Number one, if you have not left a five star review for this show, I'm gonna ask you right now, please stop. Please press pause, please go to the iTunes app on your phone, scroll down, hit five stars on the Improve It podcast. That's all you have to do. Literally, a team of humans over here does a happy dance. But what that review does is it tells guests, because they have no other metric other than just seeing the amount of reviews on this show to decide whether or not they wanna come on that this audience likes what they hear. And I know you're listening, so please leave us a five star review on iTunes if you have not. Housekeeping item number two, our wellness workbook is only going to be around for a few more weeks.
Erin (03:14):
So if you have not taken our wellness quiz, gotten your play your way into Wellness workbook, that gives you free tips, tricks, tools, energy rituals, best practices, techniques for you to start an indoor day rooted at improv, go to the link in the show notes and download your copy today. So I wanted to say those two things because we have so much to cover today. I didn't wanna forget it. They're just two very, very important things that would mean so much to me if you gave us that review. And then also, another way to invest in yourself is to get this workbook with intentional practices that you can put into your life daily. It's absolutely free. It is for you. Link in the show notes. So let's get back to the concept at hand. We're talking about your self-worth, and we're talking about how to live in abundance.
Erin (04:10):
Something I really want you to think about is the fact that we can't control the things that come our way in life. Unexpected illness, unexpected loss of a family member or loved one, a global pandemic. Things that are out of our control are out of our control. But we have two things, my friends in life that we can control, and that is our attitude and our effort. So I wanna start today's show by just talking about my own attitude, my own effort, my own struggles, because I know a lot of people can relate. And through that story, I'm gonna help you. Okay? So bear with me here. I wanna give you a quick update where I'm at currently with my concussion. And if you've haven't listened to probably the whole month of June and July, I'm gonna give you a lot of episodes, boiled into one.
Erin (05:11):
And if you're new here this is where you're gonna get caught up. So in May of 2023, I got a concussion. I jumped off a 40 foot cliff in Costa Rica. You heard that correctly. And I hit my head really hard on the water. I did not know I had a concussion For about six weeks, I was walking around like a zombie. I literally had no clue what had happened to me. I didn't connect the dots and think that I had a concussion. I was thinking that my tailbone hit the water first, and I was more concerned about my tailbone that my head. And then it just went into this really awful period of my life where everything felt arduous, everything felt overwhelming. I'm a mom, obviously parenting was extremely challenging. Writing emails at work was extremely challenging. Speaking on stages was very challenging. Everything, even brushing my teeth was like, oh, I gotta do this.
Erin (06:11):
It just felt like I was so burnt out, so depleted. My mind was not working correctly. My brain was not working correctly, and I was in a really, really low place. So I like to call the version of me pre jump or or pre-con concussion, B, c, Erin, BC before concussion, okay? Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. And that version of me lasted for 40 years. She was an extremely overworked, over busy overscheduled person who had an extremely high sense of self-worth. But that self-worth came from validation from others. It came from achievements, it came from trophies, it came from accolades. It came from the world outside of me telling me I was doing great because inside of Erin bc, that was a whole other story inside of Erin, bc. Did not believe that she had lived up to her full potential inside of Erin. BC was a scared, afraid, nervous, timid, afraid to really look at her own reflection in a mirror person because I wasn't sure if I liked it or I wanted to like her.
Erin (07:45):
So giving you more insight into that. I mean, I would literally tell myself things that I would never say to my best friend or even my worst enemy. I would say things like, you're not good enough for that. Why would people listen to you? When I started this show, that was literally the thought running through my head. Why would people listen to you? Why would people wanna follow you on social media? You have nothing important to say. Why aren't you spending more time with your son? Why aren't you working harder? Why aren't you where she is? It was a very negative place inside my own head. Outwardly. I gave it to everybody else inwardly. I beat myself up. I was never happy with my looks. I was never happy with where I was in life. I was never enough. That's it to myself. I was never enough.
Erin (08:52):
And when I lived in air in bc, I lived in scarcity. I was blocking a lot of things that could have come my way. A lot of people, a lot of opportunities. And I was not living in a state of flow because everything felt hard. The beginning of my day was rushed. The end of my day was, what's next? What's next? What's next? It was a hamster wheel. It never turned off. Rest was an afterthought. And it was actually something I thought zero about. It was not on my radar because if I rested, it meant I wasn't producing. And how I was receiving my validation was from outside people telling me I was good, not me.
Erin (09:48):
So my aha moment came months into this concussion recovery. Once I finally figured out what was going on, once I finally had the right diagnosis, I realized that I wasn't just healing my brain injury, I was healing my mind. Because friends shocking revelation, your mind and your brain are different. Your brain is an organ. Your mind is every single cell of your body, every single cell of your body. Your thoughts are your mind, your thoughts permeate every single part of your body. Your thoughts create illness, your thoughts create dis-ease. Your mind is where everything starts and everything ends.
Erin (11:02):
So knowing that your mind is everything, and it is your inner voice. I took a very hard look at what my mind was telling me. My inner voice was mean. She was a mean girl. She was a mean snake. Like she just was conniving and twisted. And I will tell you, she didn't really love me and I didn't love her. We were in a constant battle. Some days she would be kind. Some days she would be my worst enemy. So I finally realized that in order to heal myself, I had to heal my thoughts. I had to look at each day, and I had to make a cognizant, intentional choice on how I would show up. And I will tell you, I got to work, and I created an action plan that I am going to give you today that is going to move you from self-loathing to self-worth, from scarcity to abundance.
Erin (12:18):
Because my friends, this changed my life. Erin, let's call her PC post-concussion. Okay? Is completely different, completely different. And I'm gonna share with you how to do that. So here's what I want you to do. Okay? I want you to take out a sheet of paper, or I want you to just pull out the note section on your phone, and I want you to draw a line down the middle. Okay? On the left side, I want you to write more. Okay? So draw the line. And you're gonna have two columns. And on the left column, at the top of that column, write the word more. And then on the right side, write the word less at the top. So two columns left has the word more on the left, right has the word less on the right. Now in the left column, your more column, I want you to write down what you want more of in your life.
Erin (13:21):
This is step two. Write down what you want more of in your life. So for me, that column looked like water, more water, more meditating, more whole foods and my diet, more time with my family, more intentional rest, more intentional. Time away from work and more sleep. Okay, super easy. Now, step three on the right side, your less column, I want you to write what you want less of. It can correlate and be the opposite of column one. So for me, that's how I did this was column one had what I wanted more of. And column two was sort of the antithesis of column one. So instead of I wanted more water, which meant on column two, I wrote less caffeine. I wanted more time being in meditation. And with my inner guidance system, which meant in column two, I wrote less booze. In column one, I had Whole Foods.
Erin (14:25):
Column two, I had less gluten. Column one, I had time with my family and I, column two, I had less time at work. And column one, I had intentional rest. Column two said I had less going, going, going. And then on my column one, I had intentional time away from work. Column two, I had les filling my work calendar. And then then finally in column one, I had sleep. And column two, I had less wasting time scrolling social media at night. Here is step four, my friends, I want you to keep this list somewhere where you can see it. You now have a list of things that you want more of and things that you want less of. And start with the first thing in the more column. Okay? So for me, my first thing I wrote was I want more water. And I wanted less caffeine.
Erin (15:23):
So for seven days, you are going to try and give yourself more water and less caffeine. For me, this looked like going from two cups of coffee a day to one cup of coffee and adding eight cups of water into my day to day. Try that for seven days, track it, keep track of how you feel, and then seven days later, go to the next thing in your more columns. So for me it was meditation. How can I add more of this into my life? How can you add more of what you want in your column to your life? And how can I give myself less booze? So then I started cutting back on my drinking. I said, I'm only drinking a couple drinks a week on Saturday and on Friday night, and I'm going to schedule more meditation in my day. I actually have now scheduled breaks in my day for meditation.
Erin (16:18):
So I added this on for additional seven days. So in 14 days, I now am drinking more water, I'm meditating more and drinking less boost and less caffeine. So whatever's in your column, keep doing this. As you go through the list, here's step five. As you go through and go week by week, intentionally adding more of what you want in your life and less of what you don't know, that these intentional efforts week by week will start to add up. They will make a huge difference in your life. You'll be bringing more of what you want into your life. So living in that abundance and you'll be changing your self worth. The way you feel about yourself matters. So through this intentional self-love, my friend, you will start to see yourself differently. You will be proud of yourself, you will be proud of yourself every time you make an intentional choice that goes with what you want more of in your life.
Erin (17:22):
And it takes bravery, my friend, to do this. It takes bravery to not do what feels normal, to not go back to the same patterns. It takes courage, and I know you can do it. Okay? Now, as you go through, I want you to continue to try to do all of these things. Now, know it will take time. It will probably take months to get through your list because you're trying to do one thing at a time, and then stacking each habit on top of that. It will take time. And you're gonna have days where you fall off, where you go back to an old pattern. And that is okay. You gotta give yourself grace. Let me just say this for free. I had that day yesterday. Mama got her period. Okay, sorry, everyone we're talking about periods on this show now. Sorry, I'm not sorry.
Erin (18:06):
And I was in a mood. I was in a funk. I had to cry, I had to get it out. And I fell into a pattern of just go, go, go. I didn't take any breaks. So on top of being hormonal, I was also exhausted. And I could not get anything done. I could not get anything done. I went back to air bc. So I've slept on it, took a step back, woke up today, it's a new day, and today is much different. So this leads me to our final step. This is step six, okay? Once you've added more of what you want and less of what you don't want in your life, this will take time yet again, it's probably gonna take a couple months. I want you at the end of this journey to write yourself a letter. And I'm not talking about the new you, I'm talking about the former you.
Erin (19:05):
So this would be Aaron bc Aaron before concussion. Okay? Here is my version of this letter. I'm going to be super vulnerable right now and read this to you. I actually wrote myself this letter this morning in a meditation, which is something I wanted more of in my life. I have really opened myself up to my inner guidance and my inner wisdom. And so when I read this to you, I want you to know that this is, this is what came out. I'm not gonna filter it. Listen, I'm just gonna sh why am I? Why am I doing this? Why am I like, well, I don't, I don't wanna read it. I'm gonna read it to you. So here it is, and I want you to do this for yourself. But here is mine. I'm nervous, okay, tame, I'm nervous. You know, I never get nervous on this show, but right now my armpits are very sweaty.
Erin (19:55):
Here it goes. Dear former Aaron, you were an amazing person to begin with. You had great leadership, awesome positivity, and fantastic resilience. However, you were also lost. You were not shown where to go or how to help yourself. You had direction, but no compass. You had a path but no ending. You now know the way you have the map, the compass, the inner wisdom. You take breaks when you need. You allow yourself to feel versus numb. You are just beginning a lifelong journey and will see what is on the other side in due time. There are many lessons, many forks in your path. But if you stay the course, you will go much further. Spread this message, share this message with others, and help them find their own path. You will inspire many along the journey. Go forward and follow your inner guide. And it is that guidance that will take you places you could never imagine back to your comparitis.
Erin (21:09):
So what if Susan wanted you to go right when you knew left was the right answer? Former you, Aaron BC would've followed. Susan knew you has instinct and gumption, and you know your own strength. Your concussion was a part of the journey. Look at where it brought you. You have breaks. You know, more is not less that less is more. You have more confidence in yourself and your inner guidance. You have many, many moments of healing, and you have found healers to help you on the path forward. You would not have gone down this path without this accident. So go fast into the trail, but slow to walk. Feel confident in the journey, but be cautious. Who you asked to join you. You have the right people on the path. Now, this wasn't always the case. Keep going step by step, break by rake, hill, by hill, what is at the end will surprise you, but it will be more than you could have ever imagined. Love the new Erin.
Erin (22:24):
I can't believe I didn't cry. Okay, well, <laugh>, this is how I cope with serious things. I laugh, okay, let me just be real on this show. I felt called to read that to y'all. And I say that because that is what the new version of yourself can offer you. Who wrote that? I don't even know who wrote that. Okay, yes, I do. My inner guidance wrote that, and it literally spilled onto my journal this morning at eight 30 in the morning. And then I had to decipher my chicken scratch and type it out for you to read it to you here today. But that is what you can get to if you believe in yourself and put time, effort, and intentionality into what you want more of your self-worth equals your net worth my friends. And the more that you live in abundance, the less that you will feel like you're controlling.
Erin (23:28):
The universe will feel like it's guiding you so much easier. It will feel less hard. You will get more of what you want 'cause you're attracting it to you and you'll feel less frazzled and over-scheduled and overwhelmed and more in your inner guidance. When you live in scarcity, you feel it. You feel it everywhere. I have a book I really wanna recommend to you that I read many, many years ago. It's called Rich Dad Poor Dad. It's a very old book, and it really changed my mindset when it comes to abundance with money. And when we talk about abundance, it can mean many things. If you want to know more about money mindset and have a deep inclination for me to talk about that on the show, I'm super happy to please send me a note. Send me a DMM at it's Aaron deal on Instagram, write me an email at info at learn to improve it.com, and we'll create a show for you about it.
Erin (24:32):
Because abundance means to me, abundance in everything, not just money. So I didn't wanna spend today's show focusing on just money, but that book, rich, poor Dad, if you are struggling when it comes to a money mindset and abundance is a fantastic resource for you. So finally, let me go back and repeat these steps for you. In order for you to live the most abundant life, take out a sheet of paper, draw two columns in the left column, put more on the right column, put less. Step two in that more column, write all the things you want more of. Step three on the right side, the column that says less, write the things that you don't want in your life anymore. Keep this list. This is step four. And start with the first thing in the more column. How can you give yourself more of that and less of the thing that you don't want? Do this for seven days. Rinse and repeat until you go through your entire sheet. And then once you have actually implemented all of these things that you want more of and take in the things that you want less of out of your life, write your former self a letter from your future or your current self.
Erin (25:47):
It's a really cool practice. I gotta tell you, it, it really moved me in a way. I did not know I was going to be moved today, and I hope it moved you as well. Friends, I am so stinking proud of you. Please, if this episode resonated with you, please consider writing a review. It would mean so much. Share it with somebody who you know is struggling, who needs abundance in their life right now. Please pass it to them. This can save them. These six steps saved me past this episode. And lastly, I just wanna say thank you for the abundance that I feel from this community. When I hear from you, it literally changes the trajectory of my day because a lot of times I'm just talking in this microphone. It's not a two-way conversation. I don't know what you like when you tell me what you like, how it hit you and resonated with you or what you didn't like.
Erin (26:46):
I am all ears. So please feel free to reach out to me on any of the social platforms at it's Erin deal, connect with me on LinkedIn, or send us a message at info at Learn to improve it.com. And just know I am so proud of you, attract more abundance into your life by putting more time and intentional effort into you. I promise you it will change the trajectory of everything. Everything. And stay tuned. Friends, we're gonna be sharing a lot more of these tips and tricks. This one is not pulled from the book specifically, but we'll hear more about the book in the weeks to follow. I would love for you to help support and help our community grow. So share, share, share this episode and just know that I am sitting here rooting for you. And you know what I'm gonna say, keep failing, keep improving because this world needs that very special itch that only you can bring. I'll see you soon.
Erin (27:50):
Hey, friend, did you enjoy today's show? If so, head on over to iTunes to rate and subscribe. So you never miss an episode. Now, did I mention that when you leave a five star review of the Improve It podcast, an actual team of humans does a happy dance? Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. That's right. So leave a review for us on iTunes, screenshot it, and send me an email at info at learn to improve it.com. I'll send you a personalized video back as a thank you. Thanks so much for listening. Improve It Peeps. I'll see you next Wednesday.