Episode 52: What "Soft Skills" Parenting in A Pandemic Adds to Your Resume
“The fact we wear so many hats and still manage to get so many things accomplished should allow anyone to feel more confident about themselves.” - Erin Diehl
Failed it! Fam, first and foremost, Happy (early) Mother’s Day to you or your loved ones. We’re dedicating this episode to all the mothers, those who have mothers, or the special individuals in your life who act like a mother.
On today’s episode, our host, Erin Diehl, is sharing the importance of achievable parenting skills you can incorporate anywhere.
Listen in as Erin talks to us about "soft skills” parenting in a pandemic.
Links from show discussions:
Episode 49 - Failures in Fertility: Why our Fertility Stories Matter
Episode 51 - Leaders, It's Time to Talk About Infertility: with Dr. Angie Beltsos of Vios Fertility
About the Host: Erin Diehl is the founder and Chief “Yes, And” officer of improve it! and host of the failed it! Podcast. She’s a performer, facilitator and professional risk-taker who lives by the mantra, “get comfortable with the uncomfortable.” Through a series of unrelated dares, Erin has created improve it!, a unique professional development company that pushes others to laugh, learn and grow. Her work with clients such as United Airlines, PepsiCo, Groupon, Deloitte, Motorola, Walgreens, and The Obama Foundation earned her the 2014 Chicago RedEye Big Idea Award and has nominated her for the 2015-2019 Chicago Innovations Award.
This graduate from Clemson University is a former experiential marketing and recruiting professional as well as a veteran improviser from the top improvisational training programs in Chicago, including The Second City, i.O. Theater, and The Annoyance Theatre.
When she is not playing pretend or facilitating, she enjoys running and beach dates with her husband and son, and their eight-pound toy poodle, BIGG Diehl.
You can follow the failed it! podcast on Instagram @learntoimproveit and facebook, and you can follow Erin personally on Instagram @keepinitrealdiehl here. You can also check out improve it! and how we can help your organization at www.learntoimproveit.com. We can’t wait to connect with you online!
Episode 52 Transcription
Erin (00:00):
Hey friend, are you a leader who is career-focused, goal-driven and possess a life long learner mentality? Do you dream about achieving your goals and spend hours Googling how tos and gurus? Does a side effect of your awesome, might I add, personality include perfectionism, the dreaded imposter syndrome and the ever-present fear of failure? Well, you've landed in the right place. We just became virtual BFFs. I'm Erin Diehl, the founder of the improv training company improve it! And a recovering perfectionist turned failfluencer inspired by the improv rule - there are no mistakes, only gifts, this podcast is the creative outlet you need to not only motivate you, but the people that you lead through interviews. With corporate leaders, entrepreneurs, and even comedians, you'll walk away becoming a more empathetic boss by realizing that failure is a part of the journey and you must fail in order to improve. In the scene of life, we all have our own unique guests that we bring to the world, and it is our mistakes that help you unwrap them. Welcome to failed it!
Erin (01:20):
Hello failed it! Family. Today's failed it! Fam member of the week is Tin1Gruik. That is from our iTunes reviews. Tetin1gruik=. Okay. I hope I'm saying that. Right. Tin1Gruik= says Love this podcast! Erin had such great energy on the podcast, brings interesting guests and perspectives to the table too. Informative, funny, motivating for sure. Highly Recommend!! Thank you so much. Truly every week I'm like, Hey, can you leave us a review? Then I read one and then I give away a gift. So Tin1Gruik you are receiving one of our improve you e-learning courses, go to our website, improve or sorry, learntoimproveit.com. Let me tell you where I work. Backslash online trainings, again, learn to improve it.com/online-trainings, pick one of 11 e-learning courses that you would like.
Erin (02:18):
And then send me an email at info@learntoimproveit.com. I'm going to hook you up with one of those for free for leaving us a review. Truly these reviews help us so much. It helps us show up an Apple and iTunes. It helps more people find the show. So by leaving us a review, you are doing so much good and it takes about 30 seconds to a minute of your time. So thank you to everyone. Who's left a review. If you haven't, we would love your support. Thanks so much, everybody let's get to failing it. Failed it! Fam. I wanted to start off this episode by saying this, even though today's show title says parenting, I don't want you to skip ahead or hit pause on today's show because even if you aren't a parent, you have a parent or you have someone in your life who is like a parent and today's show might just give you a little more insight into what they have gone through at certain points in your life to make sure you were taken care of and loved.
Erin (03:29):
And for all my parents out there, go ahead, pour yourself a glass of wine or a bubbly seltzer water in a fancy little glass, put your feet up and lay back because number one, you deserve it. And number two, holy shiitake mushrooms. This has been a year for the ages. I mean, truly there is not enough Botox in America to release the wrinkles that 2020 to 2021 put upon us. So today's episode is here to shed light on what we've all been through or witnessed others go through and give a little attitude of gratitude for what has happened and transpired this past year. It's also a resume building workshop for any parent who went through 2020 to 2021. So go ahead, get out those word docs. It's time to update those soft skills on the old Rez. Now I'm going to start this show in the right way.
Erin (04:36):
And I want to say this because I know I am a privileged person. I recognize this privilege and I realize that as a white woman in America, I have definitely been given more opportunities just by the color of my skin. And I have suffered far less hardship than many women parents. So today's reflection is through the lens of what I faced and know that I realized that there are many, many more stories that are not shared in this specific episode, as it relates to parenting through the pandemic. And as you may note, I try to bring on as many different types of people to the failed it! Family, you, as guests, right? So I try to bring up all different types of people and we're all voices are welcome. And I want to say that before I dive in today, it's important for me to point this out as I am truly becoming more and more aware of this privilege.
Erin (05:48):
And I want to make sure that I'm also holding space here for all voices to be heard. And also that my failed it! Fam it's May and Mother's Day is just around the corner. And for many, many years, Mother's Day was hard for me. I am so blessed to have an amazing mother in my life. Shout out Janice. Know you're listening. Okay. Hey, but I wanted to very badly become one. And I'm so sensitive around this hallmark holiday, because I know there are so many families out there suffering who desperately want to become parents. And if you haven't, I would encourage you to go back to episode 49 of this podcast failures in fertility: why our fertility stories matter or go to episode 51, where we have my fertility doctor, Dr. Angie Beltsos at Vios Fertility on, these are great, great resources for you. If you feel like you're struggling with fertility or feel alone in this journey about parenting.
Erin (07:02):
But I wanted to use this theme of Mother's Day to also shed light and give some kudos to anyone who is parenting in some way, shape or form during this pandemic. Now as a teacher of soft skills, I want you to know my friends, soft skills are the hardest to teach. Let me repeat that. Write this down. Tweet it. Soft skills are the hardest to teach. That's why I have a job. So we offer virtual and in-person workshops and improve it on things like leadership, taking initiative and creative risks. Thinking quickly on your feet, presentation skills, networking. The list goes on. We have 11 offerings. All of these are designed to help you get outside of the box by using play or improvisation to help you feel what it feels like to do these soft skills. Well now I don't want to sell myself short here, but Holy hotdogs, what a crash course the past year was we say it improve it, that we offer experiential training.
Erin (08:18):
But what you my failed it! Fam received this year was immersion therapy. There was no, dip a toe and see how that feels. Or maybe I'll put a little foot in, you know, you had both legs in the water and if you didn't know how to swim, you were doing the doggy paddle or the breaststroke. And just trying to tread and stay above the water. Heck, you, you might still be treading water, waiting for someone to throw you a life vest so you can take a moment and catch your breath. I still have those days. Also fun fact, I want to caveat. I was a lifeguard during college, so I don't want to brag, but if you were literally drowning, I may potentially quite possibly be able to save you. TBD. I needed a refresher. I digress. So friends who are parents, friends who know parents and heck, just people.
Erin (09:13):
I want you to get ready to spruce up that resume, your LinkedIn profile, because here are the seven soft skills I know every parent needs to add to their resume after this crazy year. I want you to think about that special skills section of your resume. And I really, and truly want you to get in there and add these because they are so valuable to any employer and you have done number one, confidence. Holy crap. If anyone can show up to a meeting with no makeup on, a buttoned up shirt, only thrown up on minutes before gym shorts and bare feet and still rock a sales meeting and say that they are not confident. Then I don't know what confidence is. We have all had to take off our work masks, open up our homes, allow our dogs to bark and showcase our flaws.
Erin (10:14):
Even though zoom does have a very nice filter where you can cover those up just saying, in fact, I think it has made many of us more confident as human beings, what we've all gone through because that shield we wore at work for so long as a defense mechanism was literally ripped off. The fact we have had to wear so many hats and still manage to get so many things accomplished should allow anyone to feel more confident about themselves. So go ahead and give yourself a pat on the back friend. You deserve it. Now add this soft skill to your resume. Number two, here's a number two skill for you to add under special skills organized. If you were to take a look at my calendar in 2019 versus 2020, wow, it's really taken a turn and it looks something similar to Tetris that you would see on an old school gameboy. Parents, we have been forced to become more organized. Some days we may feel like we are totally failing in this department, but if you managed to get your kids dressed off to school or their virtual zoom, then park yourself in front of your computer for day eight hours, then cook dinner, get the laundry done, get the kids fed and bathed, and then find some time for you. You are nailing it - not to mention if your work day includes multiple breaks for helping with Zoom or homework or mom, will you please make me a snack, add organization to your resume now. Hey failed it! Fam, are you a leader for a small or large team that's stuck working from home. Are you missing the in office happy hours or training sessions that allow people to interact and get to know each other? Are you sick of staring at a spreadsheet?
Erin (12:18):
And you want something that will not only enhance team morale, but also build soft skills. Then improve It! Has your back. We've pivoted all 11 of our in-person soft skill training workshops to this virtual environment. Using zoom, we'll create a memorable hour and a half experience that can train your team on things like effective communication, leadership, thinking quickly on your feet, presentation skills and networking all in this virtual environment, leading a team of interns, let us wow them with our career. One on one workshop leading a sales team has figuring out how to cold call or even warm call in this virtual world. Have our team of improv professionals facilitate our sales training workshop. If this is the spice that your team needs to get out of this work from home rut, email us at info@learntoimproveit.com again, that's info@learntoimproveit.com and that's T O improveit.com. Or you can head to our website, learntoimproveit.com to learn more. We would love to help you improve your it virtually whatever your it might be.
Erin (13:38):
Number three, understanding if you are a leader, this soft skill has got to be added to your resume. Team member late because their internet wouldn't turn on is a team member not feeling well or needs a personal day in the middle of a big project due to the weight of the health pandemic or the social injustice pandemic. Is your team feeling a bit down because of what is happening in the world or the fact that they can't go outside because it's cold and they have nowhere to go, or the fact that they are stuck staring at their screens for eight hours on den and their offices also where they sleep. You've been understanding. Is your child sad because they can't go to school, they've heard scary things from the news or they haven't socialized with friends in a few weeks? You've been understanding, write that down.
Erin (14:32):
Number four, resilience, congrats. Here's your certificate. You and the rest of the entire world can get it framed and hang it on a wall in your office. World's most resilient human. If you are saying to yourself, well, I don't identify with that word. There were days I spent laying on my couch, sobbing drinking wine and benching Schitt's Creek. That's okay. The mere fact that you are listening to this podcast, that you were doing something to better you shows that you are resilient. Did you have a business that had to pivot from in-person to virtual in 2020, saying for a friend, resilient have a team that you had to restructure in the past year. Resilient - have a dream that you thought would be accomplished in 2020, but it was ripped to shreds and you had to pause or change the course of how it looked completely - resilient.
Erin (15:34):
You are stronger than, you know, my failed it! Fam. We were all resilient in 2020, and we are still going strong. Write down resilience on that resume, resilience on the rez. Here is your fifth skill that you gained this year. My friends, assigner, A S S I G N E R. I have a nasal twang. Sometimes it sounds weird. Assigner I know you failed it! Fam. I know you are a leader. You were in charge of people, or you are on your way to being in charge. You had to become the ultimate delegator in the past year from assigning team members, new tasks and roles and responsibilities to asking for help when you need it. In terms of childcare, favors from friends, the list goes on. I became the ultimate delegator in 2020. Now I had already done a lot of this when I went on maternity leave with my team, but I had to restructure what we were doing.
Erin (16:41):
And I had to ask for help instead of taking on all of the work myself. Now, this is very hard for me because I like to know how things work before I pass the task on. There was very little time for this. During the pandemic, we rolled up our sleeves, we got the work done, and we figured it out. As we went, I know that you did the same. You had to. And if you didn't have help, perhaps you realize that you can't do this alone. No one can. We cannot parent teach lead teams or help others without help. It's just not possible. So right. Assigner or master delegator on your resume. You freaking deserve it and know it's okay to ask for help. Every single person on the face of the planet needs it. We are in this together and we cannot do it alone.
Erin (17:39):
Here's your six skill -grateful. If this past year taught us anything, it's that we need to savor the moments, count our blessings and be grateful for what we have. Our health became our biggest forms of wealth. The life that we so easily took for granted before with the travel, the trips out to eat the large gatherings, the way we commuted into work, the hugs, the interpersonal connections we felt and had on a daily basis. When all of that was stripped away, we received a deep sense of gratitude for some things that we so easily took for granted on a personal note, I realized this year how stinking and lucky I am to have my family, how much stuff and possessions didn't matter. How lucky I am to have them in my lives. But when the world shifted and all we wanted was just space and grass and family traveling from Chicago to South Carolina, with my husband, my dog, our son, and literally packing up everything that mattered in our four door, small SUV.
Erin (18:51):
I was reminded in that moment that in that car was everything I needed to be happy and fulfilled. I am sure that you have felt immense senses of gratitude at some point in 2020 or 2021. Maybe it's gratitude for the food on your table and the people who were still working and risking their lives through the pandemic to make sure that you had that food. Maybe it's gratitude for your home, for shelter, from the cold or the heat, and for the ability to stay and work in it. During the pandemic, maybe it was gratitude for the breath that you took with clear lungs that reminded you that you are healthy. While many, many others were not. Gratitude is a practice my friend. And if you don't feel like you can add it to your resume now, start practicing. It will change your attitude. It will change your life period.
Erin (19:54):
And finally, our number seven skill. I want you to go ahead and add to that res, is empathetic - empathy. There were two pandemics this year - a global health pandemic and a pandemic for much needed change. And for social and racial justice. We've all been forced to look at our lives, our own privilege, and think beyond ourselves. Black and Asian American voices were heard louder than ever as we saw the deaths of George Floyd, Briana Taylor, Elijah McClain, Dante Wright right? The list goes on. We have mourned their loss, but also have mourned what this has meant for people of color and for marginalized communities for decades. That's why I started out the show today, acknowledging my privilege. Empathy, compassion, kindness - that is what we, as the failed it! Fam have felt this year. You felt it because I know you, you care about people and what our friends, our coworkers, our teammates are feeling. To be a parent and to not be empathetic to the parents of these people whose lives were lost is not in our DNA.
Erin (21:10):
You care, you want a better world. You are a better world. And because of your empathy and action failed it! Fam, we are working our hardest to make it. Empathy is the first step, putting ourselves in other shoes, seeing a neighbor or a friend who is struggling to feed their family and asking how can you help. Seeing a friend whose business is struggling and asking, what can I do? Empathy is the root of your heart. So go ahead and put empathy and all caps under special skills on your resume friend. This is you so failed at fam. Let me recap for you here. Confidence, organization, understanding, resilience, assigner, grateful, empathy. These seven words are the soft skills that you can say you learned during the pandemic as a parent, as a leader, as a person going through this tough time. If you need an easy way to remember these words during your next interview, whether it be for a job interview, a podcast interview, or even a question over dinner, here's the acronym for what you have learned during this pandemic.
Erin (22:36):
Courage, C confidence, Oh, organized, U, understanding, R resilience. A assigner G grateful E empathetic. You have, and you possess more courage than, you know, my failed it! Family. I'm so, so proud of you. And I cannot wait to see how you take these soft skills and do even bigger and bolder things. Knowing what you've done in the past year, you should know that it took just that courage. You are an amazing human keep going, keep being courageous and congrats on all of the courage you embodied in the past year. Fail. Yeah. Failed it! Fam fail. Yeah. Hey friends, thanks for tuning into failed it. I am so happy. You were along for the ride. If you enjoyed this show, please head on over to iTunes, leave us a five star review and subscribe to the show. So you never miss an episode. New episodes drop every Wednesday. Now, if you're really feeling today's show, please take a screenshot and tag me on Instagram at keeping it real deal and share it to your stories so we can bring more people to the failed it. Family. I'll see you next week, but I want to leave you with this thought, what will you fail at today and how will that help your future successful self? Think about it. I'm so proud of you and you are totally failing it. See you next time.