Episode 151: How to Become a Recovering Perfectionist Turned Failfluencer with Jess Joswick
Imagine waking up and making your to-do list as usual, but then there’s a twist: you tell yourself that each item on your to-do list only needs to be done in an average way.
The project doesn’t have to be flawlessly worded. The kitchen only needs to be clean enough to make dinner tonight. The workout can be 20 minutes instead of an hour.
If you start C+ing your life, as Jess Joswick and her clients say, you start working against a perfectionist mindset. What would happen if you did? How does this change your relationship with productivity? With failure?
ICYMI – Your Post-Episode Homework: For one whole day, track what brings you energy and what doesn't. Make a simple list with zero judgement and full honesty. How can you include more tasks that energize you in your day-to-day? Make an action plan that doesn’t have to be anything extreme. It could be as simple as going outside first thing in the morning or calling a friend during your lunch break.
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Erin Diehl is the founder and Chief “Yes, And” officer of improve it! and host of the improve it! Podcast. She’s a performer, facilitator and professional risk-taker who lives by the mantra, “get comfortable with the uncomfortable.” Through a series of unrelated dares, Erin has created improve it!, a unique professional development company that pushes others to laugh, learn and grow. Her work with clients such as United Airlines, PepsiCo, Groupon, Deloitte, Motorola, Walgreens, and The Obama Foundation earned her the 2014 Chicago RedEye Big Idea Award and has nominated her for the 2015-2019 Chicago Innovations Award.
This graduate from Clemson University is a former experiential marketing and recruiting professional as well as a veteran improviser from the top improvisational training programs in Chicago, including The Second City, i.O. Theater, and The Annoyance Theatre.
When she is not playing pretend or facilitating, she enjoys running and beach dates with her husband and son, and their eight-pound toy poodle, BIGG Diehl.
You can follow the failed it! podcast on Instagram @learntoimproveit and facebook, and you can follow Erin personally on Instagram @keepinitrealdiehl here. You can also check out improve it! and how we can help your organization at www.learntoimproveit.com. We can’t wait to connect with you online!
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Episode 151 Transcription
Erin (00:00):
Welcome to the Improve It Podcast, improve It peeps. We are back with Jess Swick. Now if you missed episodes 1 49 or episode one 50, go check out part one and part two of this conversation. Jess is on the show today and we are talking about becoming a recovering perfectionist. I personally call myself a recovering perfectionist turn failfluencer, cuz I've really leaned into this concept of failure over time. Did not come overnight. Let me tell you that for free. So we're gonna talk about three ways today to becoming a recovering perfectionist. How can we break them down? You are going to love it. I'm gonna stop talking. I'm gonna turn it over to Jess. Let's improve it with Jess Josswick.
Erin (01:02):
I wanna talk through that self-development piece that's so big because as entrepreneurs we do have the ability to shape our days and to create our days and make them work for us, although it does not always work that way cuz things come up and you know, meetings change and clients have needs and all the things. But I will say if you have the ability to just know the bigger picture, you know how you then have the ability to scale back and decide what works for me at this specific time so I can get these big picture projects done first and then I can get to the things that are less, I call 'em the seeds and the weeds. So you plant the seeds first in the morning and then you pull the weeds and the afternoon. I love that. You know? Yes. And that is huge.
Erin (02:00):
That, that right there from a perfectionism standpoint, I feel like could help anybody because once you know that big picture, you're able to see, okay, where are we going? And I think that is probably one of the biggest problems for perfectionists and, and I'm speaking for myself, is when I don't have direction. And when I didn't have direction, I didn't know where I wanted to go. I was a perfectionist because I was rooted in this fear of this project actually means so much more to me right now because this is all I've got. But because I know now <laugh>, does that make sense? You know? And it's like, absolutely. I think about that and it's funny because back when my twenties, I was just floundering. I mean, I'm telling you, I was supposed to be a talk show host 10 years ago and I was like, I'm supposed to be Oprah.
Erin (02:55):
And it never happened. So I was like, okay, all of this, none of this makes sense. And everything I did felt like the thing that I was showing the world, and it felt so raw and vulnerable. So I was terrified all the time of the things I was doing. Once I found my purpose, which is improve it and the work that we do, everything changed. And it took me a long time to break those chains and let go of control. But once I did, it was so freeing. And I mean, right there from a perfectionist standpoint, I think you have inspired so many people today to realize their bigger purpose. Because if you can realize that, then that small project that you're putting out is just a little piece of the big picture. It's a little piece of the puzzle, not the whole puzzle.
Jess (03:46):
Yes, absolutely. Yeah, I love that you said that because you know about being in your twenties and not knowing what you wanted to do. I I totally relate to that. And it doesn't just, it isn't just something that happens in your twenties. It can happen really in any decade. I see this with, with folks who are, you know, transitioning from one career to the next or from having a career working for someone else to starting a business. It's, it is, there's always that point where you're like, oh, I feel totally naked right now, or I feel <laugh>. Like, yeah, I'm not even sure what, how to talk about, you know, this this thing other than I just know that it's important. Like I'm called to it in some way. But when you, when you are fully committed, it, it does change so much.
Jess (04:34):
It does. It's, it's actually really, I find it calming. Like, okay, this is gonna be a long call. You know, I'm in it to win it. I'm just the conduit for all of this stuff. Rather than like the genius who has to make everything happen. Like you, once you once that ego, it is an ego death. Like once you go through that, you're like, okay, I actually don't need to be here alone. And yes, this is important, but like, I'm not that special. Like there are other people who can help me <laugh>, it's not all me.
Erin (05:09):
Yes. Oh my God. And it's so freeing too. It's like and, and I'll tell you, that's just even leaning back into the story for a minute. When I first started improve it and I was doing everything on my own and I, you know, I did every single thing in this business. When I handed over a piece of that, it was like giving somebody my child <laugh>. I was like, take this social media account and run with it, but oh, let me hold your hand for a long time. You're gonna be in diapers for a long time. And like, it was so stupid. It was so dumb. And it took, and I actually will never forget one of the girls on my team who said, she's still with me today. This is Christie, our director of talent. She was like, you have to, to let go of this or it's never gonna work.
Erin (05:59):
And she just was so blunt and I, the moment I let go of it, I was like, copy me on every email. Why did no, no, I don't need to be on those emails. And so, I mean, I, this was my perfectionism plaguing me, hindering me from innovating, hindering me from actually doing, implementing the things and fundamentals that we teach here. So I wanna give our listeners three steps. Okay. If you could say, cuz we've probably have a lot of perfectionists. I'm just gonna assume you know what it means to assume, but I'm gonna assume we <laugh>, we have some people listening today who are perfectionists who want to become recovering perfectionists. Because if you're a perfectionist, it will always slip up every now and then. It's never gonna like just go away. But you can become a recovering perfectionist. So if you could give them, prove it peeps three steps to becoming a recovering perfectionist, what would it be?
Jess (06:58):
Okay, let me, let me think for a second here. I like this. I think the first thing would be get clear on your big, your big why. What is the impact that you wanna make in the world? Everybody has it. Even if you're rolling your eyes and you're saying, well, I'm just a little old, you know, social media manager over here or whatever. Like, no, like, you chose this for a reason. What was it? Yeah. And what do you want it to be to I think it would be create identify where you are leaking your own resources. So the three resources that I help my clients, you know, manage and, and grow are money, time, and energy. So where, where are your own leaks? Where are you? Just wasting <laugh>, wasting <laugh>, basically, I am
Erin (07:56):
Here for this. Jess. Yes. I like this. What stuck out to me is so much I just screamed. Sorry. Everyone, turn your volume down. It gets hot in here. <Laugh>. Okay. All right. Now do you hear that static? That's from me screaming. Okay. What's number three? What's number three?
Jess (08:11):
Okay, number three would be approach most of your work with a c plus mindset. And ooh, this is my clients, you know, have turned this into a verb like I'm c plus in this thing. Because most of what we do, especially if you're an entrepreneur, like most of what you do, we just don't have time to do the a plus. But that's what we're going for when we are perfectionists. Like we're going for the a plus on everything. It doesn't need to be the a plus. Like it really doesn't. So look for where you can c plus, like even at the top of my day, I'm like, okay, so I've got these things I have to do. Here's the order I'm gonna do a man, what can I just C plus? Like what can I just, you know, kind of doesn't need the best use, doesn't need the best, you know, know of my brain energy doesn't need all of my focus. We all have things like that. And it doesn't even have to be low level. It can be something larger. If we're, if we're always going for the a plus, we're never gonna make the impact we wanna make.
Erin (09:11):
Yes, there's a church. Hey man, there's a choir. Amen. Yes. Oh my God, I feel like someone listening. I, you know what? You just feel like you just spoke to someone you know, maybe yourself. But I have a dear friend who I'm gonna make sure listens to this episode in particular because perfectionism is truly, I wanna call it a disease. It is, it is. It makes us have disease in our bodies and it ha it really is something that can take away from joy and the freedom of life. And I'm so loving these three steps that impact you wanna make in the world. Like identifying that first, knowing your why. We call it the it here at improve it. What is your it your thing that makes you you when you know that okay, everything comes, becomes clearer. I mean, I just wanted to like stand up and clap for you when you said Id <laugh> identify where you're leaking your resources, your money, your time and energy. Because to, I want, can you expand on that? So when you say leaking your resources, so where are you spending too much money? Where are you spending too much time? Where are you spending too much energy? How do, how can you identify that?
Jess (10:44):
Yeah, it's <laugh>. This is honestly something that it takes a long time to do. It can take a long time to do. And you know, it's not just about wasting money because we go right to when, when I hear that and when a lot of folks hear that, we go right to like, oh, well I gotta cut all this stuff that brings me joy. Like, I gotta cut, I gotta make some, you know, I gotta trim the budget.
Erin (11:05):
Yeah.
Jess (11:06):
I think, you know, my my stance on that is if, if something is, is bringing you joy and it's it's helping you reset, it's helping you be a better you, it's giving you time back. It, there's no way that it can be frivolous. Like there's no way. It, it's, it's a requirement, you know? We can't operate without joy. We can't operate and just go through life and, and slog it out. Especially when we don't, when we have the choice. Like we have an alternative <laugh>, you know? So if you have the privilege to choose joy every day, then then do it. You know, then, then keep, keep that in your life. But we all have things that are, are taking too long. You know, I'm, I'm going through a, a huge audit of all of my systems and like, I'm obsessed now with like automating as much as possible.
Jess (12:02):
Like every week I'm like, my team, okay, can we automate that? Like, what can we do? Because those are, you know, a lot of what we do on the, on the backend of our businesses are energy drains and time, but it's, it's just a pain. Like <laugh>, there's things. Yeah. And I know there's probably some people out there who are like, well, that's actually my favorite part. <Laugh>. Yeah. So then your energy leak is somewhere else. Like what, what do you just like drag your feet on? You don't like to do it? Anything like that is a minus energy. So I actually have people track, I have my clients track what brings you energy and what doesn't. Hmm. What's taking all of your time? You know? Because a lot of, a lot of them say, well, I don't have time to do whatever, you know, I don't have time to do this. Okay, well what is taking up your time? Because you're spending it in some way. And so once you're, once you have the data, basically you can, you're more aware of all of the things that are actually taking your time. And then you can decide if it's, if it's valuable and if it's worth it. And rest, I will say is always worth it.
Erin (13:13):
Yes.
Jess (13:14):
Anything that I plan, I plan with rest first. So this isn't like a quest to be more productive, it's just, it really is about what, what helps you operate in your entire life.
Erin (13:28):
Yes, yes. Okay. Yes. Yes. Because I've just leaned into this concept of rest being productive and it's life changing. I, I was so tired for 39 years going into my 40th, I'm gonna be very rested.
Jess (13:46):
Nice. Good <laugh>.
Erin (13:47):
Yes. Now
Jess (13:48):
Happy to hear that
Erin (13:49):
<Laugh>. Thank you. Thank you. She, she's finally, she finally woke up. But she needs to go back to sleep. So <laugh>. Yeah,
Jess (13:56):
Exactly. <Laugh>.
Erin (13:58):
So, okay. I love these three things and I'm your third thing, your third step is approach. Most of your work with the C plus, which I'm just so here for, and I think definitely resonates for the perfectionists out there. Oh my God, just try it and you'll see how much more freeing it is. Your C plus is. Somebody's a plus. Think of it that way too. Exactly. Exactly. C plus is, is an a plus for somebody else. I'm loving this conversation so much. I feel like I could talk to you forever, but I want to know this. I have a burning question. What is your, it, what would you say is your purpose, Jess? What's your one thing you wanna bring to the world?
Jess (14:39):
My purpose really is to change how we do business. It's not about just changing the culture. It's not about just giving people, you know, a ping pong table and a pizza party. It's, it is about rooting out things like perfectionism you know, realizing that a lot of the structures that we've built have been, you know, discriminatory and rooting out the things that don't leave room at the table that are really exclusionary and are killing the planet. And so that's, that's my big why, you know, to, to find a new, a new way to do capitalism. There has to be a way that we can invite in more regeneration and less taking and less ego-driven decision. Fewer ego-driven decisions. So yeah, that's that's what what drives everything that I do.
Erin (15:38):
I love it. Okay. Justin, if somebody wanted to find you, how could they find you on the internet? On the internet, not not come to your house. They're not coming to your house. If they could, if they could find you on the internet, how could they do that? <Laugh>
Jess (15:53):
So they can find, you can find me on the internet in a few places. And I'm active as far as social on Instagram and LinkedIn. Linkedin is just my name, Jess Swick. I think I'm the only one. I'm definitely the only one with green hair <laugh>. And then on Instagram at Backbone Business. And then my website is backbone business.com.
Erin (16:20):
Love it. All right. We're putting all that in the show notes. Check her out on social cuz I love your green hair. It's so beautiful. And you have Thank you. You're beautiful inside and out, so we are thrilled to have you here. Thank you so much, Jess.
Jess (16:34):
Thank you so much, Erin. This was a lot of fun.
Erin (16:46):
Improve it. Oh my gosh. Okay. This concludes our conversation with Jess Swick. Again, if you missed episodes 1 49 or one 50, go back and check them out. But I am here for this conversation about the three steps that we can take to becoming a recovering perfectionist. What so good. So, so good. And here's what I want you to take away from today. I want you to track what brings you energy and what doesn't track what brings you energy and what doesn't. Jess mentioned she does this with her clients. I think it's a fantastic exercise in realizing what is leaking our resources, as Jess says. But for one whole day, track what brings you energy and what doesn't. How can you include more tasks that energize you in your day-to-day? I'm so proud of you for the work that, that you're putting into yourself. I'm so proud of you for showing up here now three times in a week, if you've listened to these consecutively, know that there are going to be so many more bites sized chunks of information here for you. I'm so thrilled to have this time for you to invest this time into you and to be able to share this learning and this evolution of you with you. Hmm. Improve it pees, you know what I'm gonna say? Keep failing. Keep improving because this world, guess who it needs you. And that very special it that only you can bring. See you soon.
Erin (18:35):
Hey friend, did you enjoy today's show? If so, head on over to iTunes to rate and subscribe so you never miss an episode. Now, did I mention that when you leave a five star review of the Improve It podcast, an actual team of humans does a happy dance? Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. That's right. So leave a review for us on iTunes, screenshot it and send me an email at info learn to improve it.com. I'll send you a personalized video back as a thank you. Thanks so much for listening. Improve It Peeps. I'll see you next Wednesday.